10 Fun Facts About ME!

One: I did not know my name was Christina for the first 5 years of my life because my family referred to me as "Stiny", "Stinky", "Christinka", "Christupid" & every other clever, traumatizing nickname they could come up with.  

Two: I have a slight O.C.D. issue that has turned out to benefit my career.  

Three: Although I may be looking at you while in conversation and may even do gestures as if you have my full, undivided attention, my attention span only lasts approximately 4 minutes.

The time spent talking to me after 4 minutes is usually wasted. However, I most likely will tune back in around minute 7. 

Four: My Little Prince, Dylan, has developed a snoring habit and it is becoming difficult to ignore. (See "Exhibit A")

"Exhibit A"
(My Little Prince Dylan)

Five: I have at least 55 angry thoughts throughout the day, in which I must consciously talk myself down from at least 40 of them. 

Six: I watched Niki Minaj's scary Grammy performance seven times the other night. 

Seven: I love when people make me laugh. 

Eight: I really do believe that I will have a sit down conversation with Oprah one day and talk about life.

Nine: It fills my heart with joy to scare people and videotape it.(See "Exhibit's B, C, & D")

"Exhibit B"-(Strike One)

 "Exhibit C"-(Strike Two)



"Exhibit D"-(Strike 3)

Ten: In an effort to get him to "flip out", I used to get pure joy from jumping out of confined spaces and scaring my ex-marine/ex-boyfriend.

I am sad to report he never did lose his cool and "flip out". (Note- "Exhibit E" may reflect the reason as to why I am now single.)

"Exhibit E"

(Ex-Marine Not Flipping Out)

Fish in Silicon Valley

Hmmm... that's weird. 

As I walked back to my car yesterday after work, I smelled something fishy. Literally. 

After making an uncomfortable face, I proceeded to my car, unlocked my passenger side door and there I noticed them... fish.  Approximately 10... all looking at me.

"Exhibit A"

"Exhibit B"

Please Note: My office is not located near water, a single sea food restaurant, cannery row, an ocean, a ship, or any other logical place that would possibly explain how 10 fish made their way downtown.

C Low Green's Cat

Does anyone else think it is weeeeird that C-Low Green holds and pets a cat in his interviews?? 

Gets me every time. 

Happy Birthday to ME!

Omgoodness... It has been awhile.

In the spirit of my birthday, I feel it is important to reconnect with the world. 

First and foremost, I believe my mother deserves a big Thank You for delivering an 8 pound, 9 ounce baby 27 years ago. (Me!) Without your hard work and determination during my beautiful and magical child birth, I may never have come out. So today, I thank you.

Moving On:

I usually am not a huge fan of birthdays because of a) my dislike for having the added pressure to be happy all day and b) the extra awkward attention that comes with birthdays. 

However, today I feel humbled. I am reminded of how lucky I am.

Although I believe that I am the creator of my world, experiences, destiny, etc., I sometimes wonder what I did to deserve the people I have in my life.

My dad and step-momma who surprised me this morning with balloons, cards, presents, and a rendition of "The Savoir is Born" with Jesus' name replaced with mine.

My momma who called, emailed and text me all day to make sure my day was going perfectly.

My sister and her girlfriend, Jon, who sent me presents three weeks ago and rehearsed a made up version of Happy Birthday for me for two days before performing it during our 8:00 a.m. conversation.

My little prince who did not attempt to attack me once today.

Xtine who showed up tonight with some of my favorite things: donuts, candy, Starbucks gift cards, cookies and tamales.

Maggie and my aunt who separately surprised me with flowers...

My grandparents who never forget my birthday regardless of whether they remember to take their medications.

Oprah who wished me a happy birthday in her subconscious. 

The rest of my family who sent me surprises in the mail, called me, text me and emailed me. 

Last, but not least....My friends who called me, text me and Facebooked me just to let me know they were thinking of me.

Thank you. I promise you... your presence in my life influences and inspires me everyday.
 

I'm Alive!

Dear My Loyal Blog Followers: 

Although I have not updated my wonderful blog for some time, I still very much appreciate the daily support that you have all given me.

Let me get straight to the point, I am alive, I am in the middle of studying for mid-terms and finals, I am sick and (at this exact moment) I am sitting in evidence, not paying attention, because I have nose drool running down my face. 

Here are some quick updates:

My little prince, Dylan, is alive, happy and fat from his Thanksgiving feasts. I am happy to report Mr. Dylan only attacked three (3) Thanksgiving guests during the holidays and only had one "accident" on my roommates white couch. It pleases me to say that progress is definitely being made.

My angry older sister and her girlfriend Jon came home for the holidays! However, after only a week of constant chaos, they retreated back to their cave in N. Carolina.

My roommates are doing well. Tiffany, Roommate No. 2's alter ego, came out at the most appropriate times during the Thanksgiving weekend (especially when cosmos were involved). Roommate No. 1 has been too busy eating "Mochi Balls" to notice his wife has an alter ego.

Oprah has yet to RSVP to my law school graduation in May 2013 and I am still yet to receive my Life Class Journal.

Although Oprah's Life Class has been over for some time, I am enthusiastic that I will one day meet Oprah and receive my Life Class Journal. 

As for me... I have discovered a routine of bitterness that I have developed that rears its ugly head around this time of year due to the stress that I instill in myself preparing for my upcoming mid-terms and finals.

I have learned that I despise the Commerce Clause, am not interested in the Confrontation Clause, understand the Equal Protection Clause, dislike the entire Family Code and am angry with the whole concept of HEARSAY.

Until next time, here are some pictures summing up the last couple of weeks:

"Exhibit A"

(Monterrey Bay Aquarium With My Momma and Sister)

"Exhibit B"

(Turtle)

 "Exhibit C"

(Jelly)

 "Exhibit D"

(It has a face)

 "Exhibit E"

(Star)

 "Exhibit F"

(Angry Older Sister & I)

 "Exhibit G"

(Thanksgiving Dinner-Brothers!)

 "Exhibit H"

(Turkey)

  "Exhibit I"

(Ms. Nicole Marie and I After Thanksgiving Dinner/Wine)

  "Exhibit J"

(Santa Cruz Hike After Stuffing Myself With Turkey)

"Exhibit K"

(Princess Birthday Party)

"Exhibit L"

(Cinderella Surprised the Birthday Girl! 

I seemed to like her as much as the 3 year olds)

 There are so many more pictures, however, class is ending! Until next time my friends...

Creepy Craigslist Killer

My friend just sent me this Craigslist Posting:

"Let me be clear. I want a girlfriend. But, I don't really want a girlfriend.

I just want one for the holidays.

Let's recognize something. The holidays suck, especially for us single people. All of your coupled friends are going to be doing couple things: snuggling by the fire, going to dinner at each others' parents houses, blahblahbarf.

Let's recognize another thing. Deep down inside, you don't want to be alone for the holidays. You want someone to do all of those cute snuggly things with, someone to get fat and keep warm next to (let's also recognize that it's getting f* cold here), and someone to accompany you to your friends' coupley holiday parties so they don't keep thinking you're a loser destined for permanent solo status.

But, you've spent all year working on your career / training for charity bike rides / getting drunk and haven't had the time or inclination to track down and capture a boyfriend. And even if you did, you're not really sure you'd want to keep him after the holidays are over, anyway.

The solution:

Be my girlfriend for the holidays. And only for the holidays.

How it works:

You reply with a picture and a brief bio (250 words max. To give you an idea, this posting is 499). If it seems like a good fit we'll set up a casual mini-date (coffee, beer, or whatever). If that's a success and we're both feeling it, we'll date until 11:59PM, January 2nd, 2012. After that we can still be friends (unless we hate each other, then we can downshift to the occasional drunken booty call).

The benefits:

• You have someone to keep you company on these witch-tit-cold San Francisco nights. Did I mention I'm an excellent cuddler? (I have references.)

• I like to cook. Especially for others. Nothing too fancy, but always tasty and satisfying. As long as you're an omnivore, you win.

• Having done it professionally for some years to pay for school, I know my way around a bar. Same goes for wine cellars and beer coolers. Homemade winter warmers? Done.

• Hate holiday music? Me too. Seeing as every other establishment or event you step into will be playing it, I'll spare you the excess.

• Love taking photos? Sweet. Let's wear gaudy holiday attire and make ridiculous Xmas postcards to send your friends and family. Just for the lulz.

• Worried about finding someone to kiss on New Year's Eve who doesn't look (or sound) like Sloth's cousin? Boom! Got you covered.

About Me:

28 years old, small business owner, active (cyclist, surfer, snowboarder), outgoing, easy on the eyes.

Not About You (aka Dealbreakers or, Don't Bother if You Exhibit the Following):

Heavy drug use, laziness, prudishness, still in love with old boy or girlfriend from years past (or if you secretly are, at least have the damn decency to not blab on about it).

Interested? Then send your pic and bio and get this ball rolling."

Are you kidding? YES, I would love to send in my resume, biography and picture to you, Mr. Creepy Craigslist Killer, so that you can use me for the holidays! 

Gross.

Dear Potential Bait for Mr. Creepy Craigslist Killer, Please. For the sake of women kind. Do not answer him. 

And Creepy Craigslist Killer, although I found this slightly entertaining and understand it is most likely (or hopefully) a joke amongst you and your fraternity brothers, it does not shed you in the best of light.

Happy Birthday!!!

Today is Ms. Nicole Marie Who's Birthday! She is officially 21 years old!!! I kid. I kid. She is almost hitting the big 3-0.

"Exhibit A"

(Birthday Girl and Me!)

The family, minus my angry older sister and her girlfriend, Jon, got together Saturday night and celebrated both, Ms. Nicole Marie Who's birthday and her monkey brother's birthday! Their birthday's are a day apart.

"Exhibit B"

(Monkey Cousin's Patient Girlfriend & Monkey Cousin)

My aunt and uncle hosted Nicole and Bryan's Saturday night birthday dinner at their house and surprised us with a guest!

"Exhibit C"

(My Roommate & Dinner Guest!)

My roommate was especially happy to meet Mr. Bieber. Although my roommate took up much of his time, Mr. Bieber was gracious enough to mingle with the other guests:

"Exhibit D"

"Exhibit E"

Mr. Bieber even went shopping with us to help me pick out some new shades!

"Exhibit F"

After Mr. Bieber left, we ate cake, drank wine and made fun of each other. Overall, it was a great night!

"Exhibit G"

Happy Birthday to both of my cousins! I love you very much! Now go and show Ms. Nicole Marie Who some love HERE!

Thank A Veteran & Their Families Today!

Thank you veterans, active service members and all of your families for everything you sacrifice for my freedom. I honor you.

Do Not Buy This Product For Your Children

Ear Muffs Dylan!

Yesterday while browsing the net, I came across a picture of the cutest Hamster which melted my little heart.

"Exhibit A"

(Cutest Hamster)

Every time I look at the picture ("Exhibit A") I giggle because of how cute that thing is. 

However, I have a confession to make. 

I too once had a cute little hamster. Actually I had two. Their names were Babs and I actually forgot the second ones name. I will, therefore, refer to him as No. 2.

What I am about to tell you has been eating me up since I first came across this picture, i.e. yesterday. I apologize for what you are about to read; however, I deem this knowledge important for all of the parents, soon-to-be parents and potential parents out there who may be toying with the idea of getting your children a tiny little hamster for Christmas.

Like every other child on earth, I begged my parents for something that was not human and was alive. I begged them for a pet. The thought of my parents giving me the responsibility of another creature's life is chilling. (Note- But Thank You Parents For Having Faith!)

However, after much consideration, my parents agreed to buy me two hamsters named Babs and No. 2. Along with the Hamsters, I received this contraption:

"Exhibit B"

(Death Trap)

The purpose for this ball is to give your pet a false sense of freedom and allow them to roam free throughout the house. 

"Exhibit C"

(How Death Trap Works)

 

Well, for a 6 year old child who plays soccer and doesn't understand the concept of empathy, the purpose of this ball is not to allow our 4 legged friend to roam the house freely, it is to occasionally kick it like a soccer ball.

I apologize Babs and No. 2. Although you were never actually hurt and it did seem like you enjoyed the rush of my sister and I throwing the plastic ball around, I do understand that our actions were probably not in your best interest. 

I am, therefore, advising all of the parents to be aware of what this ball is really used for if you decide to get your little rugrats a furry friend for the holidays.  

Or... you can just teach your kids not to harm small animals. Awkward. 

The Count Down Continues

In approximately 537 days I will be a Law School Graduate! 

 

Mood: Excitement! 

 

I have 172 days until I finish my third year. 

 

Mood: Determined!  

 

Only 24 days until third year mid-terms/finals...ahhh 

 

Mood: Sick feeling in my tummy. 

 

Just 14 days until my favorite Holiday-Thanksgiving! 

 

Mood: Hungry!

In 6 hours I have to have 100 pages worth of briefs completed for Evidence. 

Mood: Hmmmm... The amount is too large to have feelings regarding it.

So what have I learned by procrastinating the inevitable and creating these timelines of "stress" for myself? 

I have learned that Oprah has a good year and a half to RSVP to my invitation for her to attend my Law School Graduation in 2013, Turkey Dinner is so close I can taste it, I spend more time at the library than my own house and Evidence is brutal, but I still love it.  

Happy November Everyone!

Saturday, November 19, 2011, is National Adoption Day!

Saturday, November 19, 2011, is National Adoption Day! 

National Adoption Day is an annual event in which courts and communities in all fifty states come together to finalize thousands of adoptions of children and to celebrate all families that adopt. 

The goals of National Adoption Day are to enhance public awareness of the need for adoptive parents, to educate would-be parents about the adoptive process, and to celebrate the local families who have opened their lives to children in need of permanent homes.

The U. S. Department of Health and Human Services estimates that there are over 408,000 foster care children in the United States, with over 107,000 of them waiting for adoption. 

Since 1987, the number of children in foster care has nearly doubled, and the average time a child remains in foster care has lengthened to over three years. Each year, approximately 28,000 children in foster care will age out of the system without ever being placed with a permanent family.  

Since 2000, more than 35,000 adoptions have been finalized nationwide on National Adoption Day.

I just read HERE that The Superior Court of California, County of Santa Clara, in partnership with the Santa Clara County Department of Social Services, will be taking part in National Adoption Day!

"Although the official observance of National Adoption Day is Saturday, November 19, 2011, the Court has arranged to have its Adoption Day celebration during morning business hours on Friday, November 18, 2011 at the Downtown Courthouse, which is located at 191 N. 1st St., San Jose."

"Judges and staff have volunteered to forego their regular duties that morning in order to turn the Downtown Courthouse into "Adoption Central", as the Court hopes to finalize the placement of as many as 30 children into adoptive homes."

"The Adoption Day celebration will officially start with an Opening Ceremony at 8:30 A. M. in the Jury Assembly Room on the first floor of the Downtown Courthouse, and will feature remarks by Superior Court Judge Katherine Lucero (Supervising Judge of the Dependency Court), as well as speakers from the Santa Clara County Department of Family and Children's Services (DFCS)."

"The Court has arranged for refreshments for the participants and activities to keep the children entertained while awaiting their adoption hearings."

"Special procedures have been set up to expedite the processing of paperwork and the movement of adoptive families to and from the courtrooms in order to finalize as many adoptions as possible by the event's conclusion at 11:00 A. M."

This makes me happy.

Blog Lesson No. 241: Well that was short lived.

Dear family, 

You may be wondering why I posted THIS yesterday Re: Black Friday=My Hell, which was a huge diversion from my normal topics, i.e. my daily conversations with my sister, Dylan's disobedience issues, my Father's struggles as a U.S. citizen and my efforts in law school.

Well to kill your curiosity, please be advised of the following:

A couple of weeks ago I was contacted by a social media strategist for Stanford Shopping Center and presented with the opportunity to be a "Mall Correspondent", which would entail writing about my experiences at Stanford Shopping Center in exchange for gift cards, exposure, etc. 

I accepted this position in an effort to (1) further my dreams of meeting Oprah (logic-the more exposure, the more the likelihood Oprah will realize I exist) and (2) start the process of making this blog a money making machine which will ultimately pay off law school. 

I am sad to inform you my fame was short lived. After only writing one blog post about Stanford Shopping Center, I received an email from the coordinator which stated, 

"Thank you for the writeup. However, I have spoken with the mall and they don’t feel that your blog is a good fit for them at this time, and they’ve chosen to discontinue the mall correspondent program."

Well... That was awkward.  Sadly... I can't stop laughing. I am assuming they didn't like the title, "Black Friday = My Hell" as a promotion tactic. 

I guess this means back to the drawing board. 

However, I refuse to place this in the "losses" column. My dreams are still big and I still hold a place setting right next to my roommates, sister and brother in law at my Law School Graduation in May 2013 for Oprah and Stedman. 

And my journey continues.

Silence of the Lambs: Dylan v. Precious

Although you may believe that it is a mere coincidence my little prince looks very similar to Precious from Silence of the Lambs, I am here to assure you it is not.

"Exhibit A"

(Precious)

"Exhibit B"

(Dylan)

It cannot surprise you that along with Dirty Dancing, Blood in Blood Out, Labyrinth and Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken, Silence of the Lambs is another one of my gems. 

Who doesn't love Silence of the Lambs? There are so many great one-liners!

You must also believe it is a coincidence that Dylan's ex-fathers may have resembled this:

"Exhibit C"

Omgoodness... I kid! I kid! I'm not that weird.

Mayberry Workshop-Support Our Local Businesses!

Mayberry Workshop

One of the undisclosed rules in Law School is to get involved. Very involved. So other than working, studying, socializing, you must get involved with your school.

Every year our school puts on a clothing sale for our students, faculty, alumni and community. This year we decided to do something a little different. We were refereed to Mayberry Worshop, who is a Full-Service Design Workshop, ranging from Graphic Design and Branding, to Apparel, and Building and Urban Design. 

Perfect.

Now can they design law school apparel?? Answer: YES!

We have been working together for the past six weeks and it couldn't have gone any better. Plus, the two brothers that own Mayberry are hot, which didn't hurt the whole process.

Mayberry designed our school T-Shirts and Sweatshirts and they are a complete hit.

"Exhibit A"
(Mayberry Workshop's T-Shirt Design for Lincoln Law School)

To learn more about Mayberry Workshop check out their sites!

Website

Facebook

When We Were Weeee Little Lads

Although I thoroughly enjoy sharing stories about my Roommates, my Angry Older Sister, my Sister's Latin Wife, my Little Prince, my Dear Friend Oprah and my daily struggles being a law student, I do not think it is fair to deprive my loyal blog followers of the rest of my family.

I would, therefore, like to give you a very small glimpse of our lives as children.

As a quick reminder of how our family became United States Citizens, I intend to give you a brief synopses of the events that made our lives happen. Here it is in a nutshell:

As you may recall, my Roommate is the oldest of three brothers born in Bogota, Colombia. My Roommate was chosen by his parents to be the first to make the journey to the United States and to return for the rest of the family when he declared it to be safe. 

"Exhibit A"

(My Dad's Scary Journey to the U.S.)

When my Father declared the U.S. safe and after my dear uncle decided to get a fresh start in life, my Father brought my Uncle to the U.S.

"Exhibit B"

(Best Friends/Brothers)

After the brothers assimilated into the U.S. culture, they decided to get married (not to each other), build a home, have 2.5 children and play soccer. 

This brings me to "us", the 4 children.

"Exhibit C"

(Ms. Nicole Marie, Angry Older Sister, ME! & Monkey Cousin)

To everyone's surprise, Ms. Nicole Marie began her journey as a clown:

"Exhibit D"

Ms. Nicole Marie was a rambunctious little child. Although her hair did not fully come in until she was 5, she still won the hearts of many with her love for her monkey brother.

"Exhibit E"

(Bald at Age 4.5)

Although confused where her little brother came from, Ms. Nicole Marie would never deny that her monkey brother was her friend.

"Exhibit F"

(Monkey Cousin)

You may be thinking that it is remarkable my Uncle was capable of having a monkey child; our family believes so also.

Unfortunately, around age 3, my monkey cousin began transforming into a human. He still, however, did not understand the concept of clothes.

"Exhibit G"

(Monkey Cousin Transforming)

Although to the blind eye my monkey cousin was starting to resemble a human, we all had to remain patient while he learned how to act as a human. 

Luckily, my Uncle took the time to help the monkey learn how to do simple human things, i.e. fishing.

"Exhibit H"

(My Uncle Teaching Monkey to Fish)

Like my uncle, Ms. Nicole Marie also stood strong next to my monkey cousin while he transitioned into a human.

"Exhibit I"

(Monkey Cousin Learning How to Take Pictures)

Occasionally, Older Angry Sister would allow monkey, Ms. Nicole Marie and I to play with her. Although, monkey had been going through his transition for some time, he still had some anxiety during play time and missed family events.

"Exhibit J"

(Left- Right)

(Angry Older Sister, Ms. Nicole Marie, ??, ME!, ??,- Notice: No Monkey)

Although my cousin monkey has slightly regressed in his progression from monkey to human, he is doing fantastic! To much of our surprise, he is graduating college with an emphasis in the study of primates!!! 

"Exhibit K"

(My Monkey Cousin 2011)