Monday, October 31, 2011
Friday, October 28, 2011
Dad: "I wish I knew how to comment on your blog but since I don't know, I'll comment here. I am on my way home safe and sound. Although I felt like crying like a little girl when the train was shaking violently, I managed to hold it together and not soil my pants. I video recorded the evacuation with my iPhone but when I got back to the station they made me erase it."
The picture below is just an example why my father has previous claimed the title.
My dear cousin, Ms. Nicole Marie, always gives my dad some competition. She responded to our Facebook Chain with the following:
He makes my heart whole. I wonder if anyone else thinks he is as funny as we do! I guess it would be helpful to understand that my dad talks with a slight Colombian accent and shocks us with certain English words, i.e. soil in pants, that we never knew he knew.
Step it up family. The day is getting nearer that "The 2011 Funniest Family Member" will be crowned!
Thursday, October 27, 2011
* Catching the Devil Dog eat my lunch.
I wonder if my roommates would care if I quit my job and just focused on my love for the law and working at the charity of my choice for the remainder of law school. That makes me happy just thinking about the possibility.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Fast Forward 45 Minutes.
After I was ready for the day, I tricked my little prince and his beefy sister Bella into the garage. I then gathered my school books, computer and everything else I needed for the day. As I was about to leave the house, I remembered that I made lunch and it was waiting for me on the island!
I walked back into the kitchen only to find an empty pan. Hmmmm... That's weird. I wonder if Roommate No. 2 was nice enough to pack my lunch for me. It must be in the refrigerator.
Well...After checking the fridge and looking in odd places around the house, I called Roomie No. 2 to ask where my lunch went. As I grabbed for my phone, I noticed claw marks on the tin foil that lined the pan where my chicken once laid.
Ruling out my little prince because of his height and weight, I realized that it was Devil Dog!
However, before I pointed my finger at the tubby dog, I called Roomie No. 2 just to make sure she didn't accidentally hide my lunch. She confirmed that she had nothing to do with my chicken disappearing. Just as I suspected.
I walked out to the garage to see the culprit. She was asleep. In her bed. Covered with her favorite blanket. She was in a food coma from eating my chicken that was supposed to last me a week!
Not cool Bella.
Friday, October 21, 2011
P.S. THE STAPLER DOES NOT GO ON THE FLOOR! I feel better. Thank you.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
We laughed, we played, we took pictures, we ate breakfast together, we learned new tricks. I wonder why he is in such a good mood.
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Monday, October 17, 2011
I apologize for the incident that took place last Tuesday. My failed attempt at trying to do something funny has unintentionally made you insecure and timid.
Your groomer informed me that because I had waited a tad bit longer than normal to cut your hair, they had no choice but to shave it all off. Thankfully they were able to save the hair on your ears and tail.
The day I left for New York was the day of the above said incident.
You began to shake and my heart melted. The nice concierge brought you to the back so that you were able to "assimilate" with the rest of the dogs.
Feeling slightly uneasy, I asked the co-concierge for a tour.
I thought to myself: That doesn't sound too bad.
I was then led throughout the Pet Motel paying less than close attention to anything the concierge said, just waiting to get at least a glimpse of the "assimilation" process.
Then it happened. I saw you. My Prince. In the corner of a not so secure, closed off area. There were three dogs surrounding you. They were growling. You were in the fetal position. I have never seen you this submissive. You were being bullied!
The concierge quickly ran up to you and your abusers to place you back in the "supervised location" where the "assimilation process" was supposedly taking place.
I was mortified. My heart sank. I asked him who was supervising the dogs and the concierge quickly rebutted all of my concerns with some indirect reason as to why the dogs were "playing" in an unsupervised area.
Knowing that my flight to New York took off in only a couple of hours, I did what any reasonable, quick thinking mother would do: I left you.
Although I stand by my decision to leave you in the hands of the wolves that bullied you, I apologize if the bulling continued. Bullies don't like what is different.
The bullies were just jealous of your spots.
However, we must move forward and understand that every hard situation just makes us stronger son.
Keep your head up. Your fur will grow back, your spots will come off, life will soon be back to normal. I promise.
I love you!
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Dear My Loyal Blog Followers,
I am catching a red eye to New York for my cousin's wedding and will be MIA until Sunday.
I understand how troublesome this may be for some of you, so I decided to give you a little preview of what important life lessons, letters to Oprah, things I've learned in law school, Dylan's life struggles and stories that mock my sister are to come.
The following is a picture of my son's new hair cut and new hair color in which he received in response to my roommates repeated requests:
Although Dylan's groomer did a good job considering what they were given, Dylan is not a happy camper to say the least.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
UPDATE: 6 more people to reach our goal of $1,000! Thank you to everyone who is donating!
Monday, October 10, 2011
Now, you must understand that the initial "reveal" could possibly be a little overwhelming for your father, so it is important you be respectful and acknowledge the fact that you understand his views on arm art.
I would also add in your "reveal" a tearful thank you. Thank your father for providing you with the tools to properly express yourself. Really thank him for allowing you to always be yourself, regardless of how much the Colombian culture dislikes arm art.
Remember, your father is the most understanding, loving, caring, insightful, brilliant, talented, thoughtful man in your life.
And lastly, the perfect, safest place to "reveal" the new addition to your body is most likely on your blog.
Friday, October 7, 2011
I hope this information has helped you as it will hopefully help me in the future.
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
P.S. Just to reiterate my point, if someone donated books to me when I was little, maybe I would have learned to spell "Dr Seuss" correctly. (See Misspelling Above)